Just Start: Things I'm Glad I Did When I Did Them

It’s my birthday! I’m 46 today, and I’m still having a pretty great time, thanks for asking. A kind of traditional thing to do on YouTube around these occasions is a video about ‘things I wish I knew when I was [age]’, and since I’m not immune to trends I did one of those last year. But today, I thought I’d do something different: I want to talk about things I’m glad I did when I did them.

I think I’ve led quite a charmed life. I’ve worked hard for most of it, and I’ve been through some very difficult times, but I’ve also managed to meander from interesting job to interesting job without any genuinely horrible ones or anything like a real plan. Working on games magazines took me to half a dozen countries and all across America — working on Men’s Fitness let me try out almost any sort of physical challenge or activity I wanted to.

Also though, I’ve often tried to grab opportunities when they came up: doing things, or going places, when I had the chance. Again, I mostly wasn’t doing this with any overarching plan, but now that I look back there’s some stuff I’m really glad I did. So here’s some of that stuff, in the hope that — whatever stage of life you’re at — you might be inspired to do some of it, too.

Staying in shape
I started working out semi-seriously at university, and I’ve never really stopped. I’ve done CrossFit, running, yoga, strength training, Olympic lifting, hypertrophy stuff (I won’t call it bodybuilding because I didn’t compete), and at least 14 different martial arts. Apart from giving me a better appreciation of what my body’s capable of, that means I’ve hit my 40s still strong and energetic enough to keep up with a mad 7-year-old and a dog, scrap with 20 year-olds at Brazilian jiu-jitsu, and haul flatpack furniture around with minimal assistance. I promise you it’s worth it.

Doing ‘movement’ sports
Yes, that’s not a real term, but I’m having a hard time coming up with a catch-all way of describing things like gymnastics, wushu, Capoeira, climbing and parkour — sports that challenge you to move your body in ways that most people never try. There’s something about doing a good dyno, or an aerial cartwheel, or a kong vault, that’s difficult to describe: it’s like unlocking a different tier of human experience. I might never do another back layout, but I’m glad I did a bunch when I had the chance.

Learning an instrument
I started playing the piano at 40, and it’s been an incredible experience. It brings you closer to music and helps you understand and appreciate different genres, it exposes you to a community of people who are doing things you can barely comprehend (and lets you sort of join it, in a small way), it gives you something to focus on and perfect that doesn’t involve a screen, and it can be a sort of meditation (or at least a flow state) when you’re really locked in. I love playing the piano, and I’m very glad I started.

Competing a lot
Well, not a lot by the standards of some of my jiu-jitsu pals, some of whom enter a dozen tournaments a year — but a lot by the standards of most people, I think. I’ve done a marathon, a half marathon, a couple of obstacle races, three strongman competitions, a bit of BJJ and MMA, a CrossFit competition, a kayak ultramarathon, and probably a couple of other things I’m forgetting. Competition is scary, but it’s also one of the best ways to fully understand what you’re actually capable of and how you react under pressure — whether you’ll quit or try, whatever you’ve told yourself beforehand. I recommend it.

Travelling alone
In my twenties, I spent four years going for an extended (month-long) holiday pretty much every year, working while I was abroad and going to Japan, Thailand, China, and Brazil. It was sometimes scary, and sometimes lonely, but being in charge of your own experience is…pretty character building, I think. If you ever meet me, ask me about the time a guy challenged me to a fight outside the Shaolin temple.

Having a family
Yup. Sometimes, I wonder what would have happened if I’d gone for this earlier — I started a bit late, by most people’s standards. But having a son is maybe the best thing I’ve ever done, certainly better than any of the stuff above. Obviously, you don’t have to have kids to have a meaningful life, and you ought to do what feels the most right. But watching my little pal grow up and learn to think, decide, enjoy things and become a happy, funny, insightful tiny person has been incredible in ways I can’t properly articulate. I could go on about this a lot more, and maybe I will at some point, but if you ever happen to read this, bud — I think you’re fantastic.

Learning to talk to people
I talked about this last week, though.

Have a great weekend!

Joel x

Stuff I like

📖 Book - The Three Body Problem
I started reading this because I didn’t want to watch it, and now I’m pretty much locked in for the sequels. History, science, speculative fiction, insights on the human condition — it’s got the lot.

📺 Show - Alice In Borderland
I started watching this on a whim and then bowled through a bunch of it after my nightly reading, pushed on by the fact that one episode does one of the most insane and shocking (and, okay, unpleasant) things I’ve ever seen in a TV show. If you know, you know.

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Please forward it to someone else! Also, if you’ve got a book or an article you think I should read, or something you think I should watch or try, please send it my way.

And if you haven’t already, please check out my YouTube channel, where I deep-dive into stuff like productivity, lifelong learning, piano and Brazilian jiu-jitsu.